Saturday, June 06, 2009

A Quick And Easy Way To Quit Smoking

I used to like cigarettes. A lot. It's probably why I returned to smoking twice after having quit. I really didn't want to quit. The third time, I wanted to quit, and I quit for good.

The first thing you have to do, is want to quit.

The second thing is that you have to ignore all those messages that say that smoking is addictive. I don't actually know if tobacco is addictive or not, but I refused to believe that it was. After all, I went to bed every night and went smoke-free for many hours until I awoke. Then how about a few more hours?

So, if you want to quit smoking, here's what you do:

  1. Disabuse yourself of the notion that smoking is addictive, or that you can't quit. It just is not true.
  2. You have several packs of cigarettes on hand. Fine. Continue smoking as is normal for you.
  3. Buy one carton of your favorite brand. This will be your Last Carton of Cigarettes.
  4. You can write that on the box with a sharpie, if you want, but it is your Last Carton of Cigarettes. Keep that clearly in your mind for however many days it lasts. Your Last Carton of Cigarettes.
  5. Continue smoking as normal, but buy no more cigarettes.
  6. When you get to your Last Carton of Cigarettes, open it and take out one pack. Set it aside as your Last Pack of Cigarettes.
  7. Continue as is normal, but buy no more cigarettes.
  8. As you get down toward your Last Pack of Cigarettes, you have to do a little planning. You have to modify your smoking pattern so that your Last Cigarette comes at bedtime.
  9. It's bedtime, you have only your Last Cigarette in your hand, and you smoke it, remembering the whole time that it is you Last Cigarette. Enjoy it. Sit on your patio in the cool night air and really enjoy your Last Cigarette.
  10. Go to bed and sleep well.
  11. When you wake up, you will have already quit smoking for about eight hours, depending 'pon how long you let yourself sleep.
  12. Go about your day's routine in the knowledge that you are no longer a smoker. Whenever you think about buying or "borrowing" a cigarette, remind yourself firmly that you no longer smoke and haven't for X hours (include the number of hours you slept). Put smoking out of your mind.
  13. For a few days, it might help to stay away from places where people smoke, and avoid smoke, smokers and places in which cigarettes are sold--to the degree that you can.

I followed this path three times. The third time just over twenty years ago.

Also, it worked best for me not to tell anyone about it while you're doing it. you don't want to hear how difficult it is. It's not difficult. You don't want to hear someone tell you you can't quit. You can, and it's the confident knowledge that you can that gets it done. You don't want your friends telling you how addictive tobacco is. It isn't. It takes a physical act of will to light a cigarette, and you simply have to refuse to do it.

I didn't mention to anyone that I was going to quit. Not before, not during and not for some time after. A few of my friends realized, after a time, that they hadn't seen me smoking in a while, and only then did I admit it.

I'm not a nut-case anti-smoking nazi, as are most of the denizens of Stalag California, and I don't mind others smoking around me as long as the smoke doesn't get uncomfortably thick. Seeing someone smoking doesn't tempt me.

I'm cured, and you can be, too. All that's necessary is that you have to want it.

What if they raised cigarette taxes and nobody smoked?

Warm regards,

Col. Hogan
Stalag California


TWC said...

At some point it doesn't matter much anymore and I think that is the key for some people.

Chatelaine said...

That part about not telling anyone is also true about dieting. I do much better about watching my diet if I don't talk about it with anyone. It's something about making it just for me, something about keeping it just for myself and not letting anyone else try to nag me about it.

Col. Hogan said...

Lady C,

After finding it hard to believe that a lovely lady like yourself would ever need to diet, I have to add that many of one's friends will,consciously or not, sabotage one's efforts at dieting or quitting smoking. It's best to keep it to oneself and let them notice it if they're paying attention.

Ol' BC said...

People are going to smoke. Mostly poorer and lower middle class folks that Obama counts on for election. One more move to keep people at the lower rungs of the economic ladder. He can continue to promise handouts and get votes. That's the overall plan of the Democrats. It's working. They are better politicians than the GOP and Libertarians.

T. F. Stern said...

I quit smoking while in the hospital under an oxygen tent after one of my lungs had a blow out. I was about to light a cigarette, still coming out from heavy drugs and surgery when a nurse walking by saw the unlighted cigarette hanging from my lips while I searched unsuccessfully for my lighter. I bet she ran the short distance in record time as she snatched the cigarette away and explained how dumb it would have been. I don't recommend this as a standard way to stop smoking.

Col. Hogan said...


It puts the lie to B Hussein's promise not to raise taxes on anyone making less than $250k a year, doesn't it?

Col. Hogan said...


No, not the funnest way to quit. Lying in a hospital bed is no fun in any case.

Good to see that you were able to turn into an old man!

mksviews said...

The cigarette nazis really piss me off, they steal money from us to push ads on tv and everywhere else telling people how terrible smoking us, yet they let it be sold. They're just thieving hypocrites, they jack up taxes on smokes in the name of stopping it, then they show us all these disgusting things that happen to smokers, yet it's perfectly legal.

I say cut the hypocrisy, cut the taxes, let people smoke if they want but don't make the rest of us pay for the consequences.