Technology is Still Scary to Some

Let me preface by saying that I, even to this day, observe that many people approach the common escalator with a degree of awe. One can watch them: Stop at the edge of the abyss, look down and judge the proper moment to step off. After these many decades of escalator use, one might think we'd find them second nature by now.

Today, I went to my neighborhood Target to pick up a few items. After taking care of business on the first floor, I took the upscalator to the second. I had to stand idly on the bloody thing, because the folks in front of me wouldn't move. A common thing. It seems as though very few people understand that, even though an escalator is moving, it's still possible to walk it like stairs to change floors more quickly.

On the second floor, I picked up a few items and had to return to the first floor to get one of the Items being prepared for me. That's when I learned that the downscalator was stopped, out of order and had caution tape over the entrance. I went to the two (and only two) elevators to see that there was a deep crowd waiting.

There probably is a regular staircases somewhere, but it isn't apparent, nor is it obviously marked. There is one out in the parking structure, but you can't go to the parking structure without passing through the checkout and paying for your goods, This, I was not yet ready to do.

Being the ne'er-do-well rabble rouser that I am, my solution was to duck under the caution tape and walk down the stalled downscalator. I picked up the rest of my purchases, paid for everything and went to the door, where I braced the security guard.

Does everyone know that the escalator is broken?"

"Yes. We have a call in to the repair shop."

"Do you know that it's possible to walk down a stopped escalator as if it's a normal stairway?"

"The escalator has been closed for safety reasons."

"Do you know that everywhere in the world that has escalators leaves them open when they're broken so that they can still be used as stairs? Your two little elevators ain't making it."

"We're sorry for the inconvenience, but we have to think of the safety of our guests."

"Well, I guess that'll have to do, if thinking isn't an option," I said finally as I headed for the parking structure. I didn't tell him that I just walked down the broken escalator, thinking that with him, I might face arrest.

I'm on the lam, but I ain't no sheep!

Warm regards,

Col. Hogan
Stalag California

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