Monday, October 17, 2005

An End to Epidemics

Boy, am I relieved! We'll never have to worry about epidemics again! Epidemics are a thing of the past!

Not so fast. The reason we'll never have another epidemic isn't that there'll never be one, it's that they've been renamed. The news media, ever looking for new ways to scare the crap out of The Great Unwashed, has decided that the specter of an epidemic is no longer very scary. Why? We have a flu epidemic just about every year, and it usually ends up that 40 or 50% of us get what amounts to a really bad cold.

How to increase the State of Fear? Read the minds of the Executive Producers of the news at CBS, NBC and ABC. "We'll start calling them pandemics! Nobody knows what a pandemic is, and we'll make it sound like the Black Plague was a walk in the park by comparison. Government schools no longer tell their students about dictionaries, so we can make a pandemic sound really, really bad!"

The word is out. Two or more people who've been in the same county this year get the same illness, It's A Pandemic! We're all going to die!

It's only a matter of time before someone'll call it all GWB's fault.

They've killed Freedom! Those Bastards!

Warm regards,

Col. Hogan
Stalag California

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