The Most Predictable Fumble of the Century--So far....

It was as if it was planned to be a huge mass screwup from the start. Hundreds of thousands of hippies outatime converging 'pon the Woodstock of 2009, there to see, and perhaps even to touch the hem of their messiah's robes.

Buzzing about the various chatrooms and message lists of the less-in-touch-with-reality from all over the country and abroad was the talk of tickets to the coronation inauguration of America's first god-king people's President. It promised to make the introduction of Elvis Presley or the Beatles seem as subdued as a cemetary, by comparison.

The glorious event fulfilled its promise in many ways. Washington DC was awash in humanity; throngs of worshippers like no Pope has ever witnessed.

Ah, but those tickets.....some were genuine and some were counterfeit. No one knew the difference. No one really cared. This was Woodstock 2009!

But, alas! As the day's festivities, and the events that drew these hundreds of thousands of worshippers to Jerusalem Washington were about to commence, it became apparent that all was not well in New Camelot. Thousands of worshipers well-wishers and fans of the new messiah were left stranded in tunnels and at locked security gates, waving their tickets to the blind eyes of a 42,500 strong security contingent with no head. I mentioned--dare I say predicted--the likelihood of severe difficulties here, just the other day.

According to a detailed story by George Loper here, the troubles didn't end with the lockout of thousands of ticket holders left freezing in lines outside the security gates, but continued as saddened and disgusted travelers attempted to catch their flights back home. The chaos found its way into the airports (no doubt with the enthusiastic help of TSA thugs), causing missed flights and hours-long delays.

Add all this to the climaxing SNAFU's: both the chief of the Supremes, John Roberts and the new King of the Universe President, B Hussein Obama, flubbed their lines. As any actor will tell you: take your rehearsals seriously. They didn't apparently. So, they had a redo, but no one thought to bring a camera or a tape recorder (although someone happened to have a hand-held voice recorder in his pocket.

Stalag California Senator Diane Feinstein is livid. She's calling for a full investigation to learn why the inauguration went so incredibly poorly. I honestly think it's commendable that, every time the federal government screws something up, one of our fine Senators is right there to call for a commission to investigate the reasons why things went so incredibly wrong. It helps keep out-of-work party hacks out of the poorhouse.

Washington would make a great sitcom, if it didn't kill so many people and cost so much money.

People shouldn't be afraid of their governments, governments should be afraid of their people.

Warm regards,

Col. Hogan
Stalag California