Thursday, June 05, 2008

All the Sports Unfit to Report

There's a sports program on ESPN called Mike & Mike. I guess it's on radio, too. I rarely watch it because....well....who would watch a sports talk show on tv? I occasionally go to a particular pizza-sandwich shop for lunch near where I work. Pretty good Phillie steak sandwiches.
While I waited for my sandwich, Mike & Mike were on the house tv.

It was unbelievable!

We're in the middle of the NHL hockey playoffs, well into the NBA baxabaw playoffs (if anybody's noticed) and well into the big league beisbol season. Mike & Mike aren't talking about any of this. They're talking about foopbaw. And they're not really talking about foopbaw, they're talking about.....get this.....Brett Farve's locker. I'm not sure who Brett Farve is, but I know who Brett Favre is.

They weren't talking about Brett Favre, but somebody named Brett Farve. Well, they were talking about Brett Favre, but sometime in Favre's ancestry, somebody started mispronouncing the name and, being from Mississippi, no one had the intelligence to correct him.

Back to the point. Mike & Mike weren't talking about Brett Favre, but about Brett Favre's locker up there in the dungeons under Lambeau Field's grandstand.

Those two sports dorks spent at least fifteen minutes arguing over whether or not Brett Favre's locker should be retired as a shrine!!

For my part, as very little as I care about it, I think it's a stupid idea, since there have been numerous foopbaw players of Favre's stature in the Packers over the length of the team's history. They'd have to move the players to a nearby barn to dress--all of the lockers in the dressing room would be shrines.

But, even that's not important. What I don;t understand is how a pretty good sports tv network can give dopes like these a tv show when there are so many hockey, lacrosse, rugby and pistol target matches going untelevised.

Well, this entry is a mite outside of my usual area of discussion, so I'll leave it there.

Now, we return you to your regularly scheduled rants.

Warm regards,

Col. Hogan
Stalag California


T. F. Stern said...

About the only sport I care about is baseball; after all, Baseball is Life.

MK said...

A locker into a shrine, isn't that where one throws old clothes and sweat socks into. Why don't they just make a bronze statue of the fellow, put him outside for all to see.

Col. Hogan said...


Well, baseball comes second, after hockey. Now that hockey's over, I'll start watching basball, though I have no particular favorite teams. Baseball started meaning less to me when they started that designated hitter nonsense. And when they moved the fence closer.

Col. Hogan said...


There are numerous statues of the great hockey players outside of arenae all over the US and Canada. There's a statue of Wayne Gretzky in front of the Los Angeles Staples Center, where the LA Kings (allegedly) play. I'm sure that's true of other sports, as well.

As for Brett Favre, they don't even seem to be able to pronounce his name correctly.

steveintx said...

I would go along with Jerry Kramer's locker being a shrine, not Bret Faver.

Col. Hogan said...


....Long pause while I look up who Jerry Kramer is.....

I still say that turning retired players' lockers into shrines will ultimately make the current players dress in a barn at the edge of town, when every great Packer player's locker becomes a shrine.

The lowly LA Kings commissioned an 8-foot statue of Wayne Gretzky and placed it outside the Staple Center entrance.

Thanks to MK for the reminding me of that.

They also hung his jersey from the rafters, along with those of Rogie Vashon, the Triple Crown Line and a couple of others.

steveintx said...

Although I think Jerry Kramer was of the best to suit in the "green n' gold", I agree with honoring players that way is stupid. The ring of honor that the Cowboys began is a much better idea.

I can't believe you had to look him up! :-)

Col. Hogan said...


Well, foopbaw is just an obscure sport that's not noticed much. Now, if you'd said Tiger Williams or Dave Semenko, I'd know exactly who you're talking about!

Anonymous said...

I think it's neat that Wayne Gretzky's statue is in (front) of staples ctr. Did'nt he play most of his Kings career at the Forum? In O.C.we have a statue of a very tall duck.

Col. Hogan said...


You're right, of course. I had season tix for a couple of those years. It was a joy to watch him play at the Forum, even as he passed his peak. I can't warm up to the Staples Center any more than I could to the Pond.

But I certainly did appreciate their having placed that statue at the entrance, for future hockey fans.

I'm very glad that the Ducks brought to Cup to Southern California. All they need now is an overpowering finesse player to similarly immortalize at the entrance to the arena.